Things are starting to look up. I'm back to doin' the things I love, making music, strengthening my friendships, working on myself and finally getting a job. However, even with those accomplishments, a split second is all it takes to tear me down.
So, I was in a pretty hype mood from the debate I had in Sociology over Affirmative Action in which I was assigned to be against it (in reality I'm in the middle. Good intent, terrible execution). I kept getting hype because when it came time to the open debate the other team kept interrupting those speaking on my side, me included. I was about to tell one of the, "Bitch, can I speak? Lemme me speak."
That whole things besides the point of this post. The hype part just adds how deep the following shit effects me. For awhile, I've been having real-time, split second hallucinations of her. I know she graduated and she's no longer with me but it's just habit/me missing her y'know? Today while I was heading into the cafeteria to get my food I look behind me and I swore I saw her. She was walking toward me with that sway I love, smiling at the sight of me. And just like that, she was gone. This immediately put me down cause it didn't take long for my grip on reality to kick in.
I keep telling myself that I only think about her because I'm lonely. But maybe it's because I miss her. I don't want to miss her but I guess I do :/.
So, I was in a pretty hype mood from the debate I had in Sociology over Affirmative Action in which I was assigned to be against it (in reality I'm in the middle. Good intent, terrible execution). I kept getting hype because when it came time to the open debate the other team kept interrupting those speaking on my side, me included. I was about to tell one of the, "Bitch, can I speak? Lemme me speak."
That whole things besides the point of this post. The hype part just adds how deep the following shit effects me. For awhile, I've been having real-time, split second hallucinations of her. I know she graduated and she's no longer with me but it's just habit/me missing her y'know? Today while I was heading into the cafeteria to get my food I look behind me and I swore I saw her. She was walking toward me with that sway I love, smiling at the sight of me. And just like that, she was gone. This immediately put me down cause it didn't take long for my grip on reality to kick in.
I keep telling myself that I only think about her because I'm lonely. But maybe it's because I miss her. I don't want to miss her but I guess I do :/.